Jumbo Package: Tide’s new weight room opens, but rumors of an indoor amusement park are exaggerated

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Or are they?!

Nate Oats has added another assistant: as was expected when Ryan Pannone took an analytics position and was released from the toxic mess the Pelicans, Pannone didn't stay in the film room long.

Just two months later, he got the green light to join the bench:

"I am extremely honored to join The University of Alabama and Coach Oats’ staff," said Pannone in the official press release. "The chance to join a legendary school with a basketball program that is among the best in the country is a privilege. Coach Oats leads a team that competes with NBA-style ball and runs NBA sets, so to have the opportunity to leverage my NBA experience to mentor and raise up student athletes was a rare and rewarding offer I couldn't pass up."

He's a very young coach, just 38, and outside of the Pels hasn't really had any appointments of note. But I would actually expect that with most of Oats’ hires, for a while at least. It's the younger generation that has embraced analytics.

I fully expect hires to be Pannone-like going forward: system-fit and serious math chops will take precedent over decades of drawin’ em up on the white beard with a grease pencil.

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I know this is going to surprise you, for the fourth time in 17 years, the Alabama weight room got another multi-million dollar refit and additional palatial goodies — because renovations in 2009, and 2013, and 2018 just quite weren't good enough.

At Bama, it's just different! WEIGHT ROOM RENOVATIONS - Pt. 1#RollTide pic.twitter.com/tSkOyHl2iH

Meanwhile, the Crimson Standard is now going on its sixth year, with not so much as a plan having been put forth about Coleman's replacement, much less turning over a shovelful of earth.

Cuz, you know, inflation and shit happens. And no one can anticipate that...inflation happens (despite the fact construction costs had been rising rapidly for three years previously). But no, really, inflation is not an excuse. Greg gave us his pinky promise in Destin!

Ignore me, I’ll be over here stewing in my own juices.

Again.

MC G Burn spittin’ some fire bars about science and macroeconomics

Alabama's Colby Shelton was named Freshman All-American, and honestly, I’d be more surprised had he not been.

He:

Set the Alabama freshman single-season home run record with 22, a total that ties for the fourth-most overall in Crimson Tide single-season history

Leads UA while tying for fifth in the SEC and 20th nationally in homers

Recorded five two-homer games to lead all UA hitters

Hit a home run in four straight games from March 3-7, including grand slams in back-to-back contests from March 4-5

Also leads Alabama with a .689 slugging percentage that is ninth in the conference

Just a remarkably dangerous hitter in an Alabama lineup that has rediscovered their pop. The Tide will need every bit of it too, against a terrifying Wake Forest team that has gone 29-3 at home, hasn't lost B2B games all season, and is seventh in the nation in scoring, and second in the nation in pitching (they’re the No. 1 seed for a reason).

Tony Mitchell had his first public comments since his absolute idiocy in the spring, and he sounds like a kid who has been scared straight.

Seriously, read this and insert "Nick Saban" or "Alabama" every time Mitchell says "God" — it works a lot better. LOL

"I just want to start off by thanking God for not just being there for me but also for slowing me down," Mitchell said, via Bama247. "Even though this situation was beyond hard for me, I find joy knowing that, if God didn't start where he did, something much bigger could have happened. I also want to thank Alabama football for seeing my potential and giving me a second chance. I am grateful for everyone who supported me through this hard time. Every day, just thinking the possibility of it all being over with devastated me. I didn't know if I would get to play football again but I continued to work out and stay close with the Lord and those who love me unconditionally.

He also claims what I think was his honest motivation here: he was just trying to "fit in"

Alabama freshman defensive back Tony Mitchell apologized following his spring arrest for marijuana possession, saying he was "trying to fit in" and made the wrong decision.

A century of social psychology can be boiled down to two fundamental needs most people have: the need to be right, and the need to be liked.

They don't always work in harmony either. And clout chasing to be an Instagram gangster is a terrible way to piss away a promising career.

Ask Ja Morant.

For the first time, maybe ever? Early 2018? Tua Tagovailoa is "completely healthy" and he's grabbing OTA's by the balls and kicking people's ass like a one-legged man in a sack race (as much as someone that genuinely nice can, I mean):

"I’ve checked on his health, I was told he's completely healthy now. Not only that, but he's been working on that Jiu-Jitsu that you’ve heard about; how to fall forward, how to protect his head in the pocket. Well, I was told the Dolphins actually implemented some of those Jiu-Jitsu workouts with their quarterbacks before practices. So, trying to get everybody used to falling down and being able to protect yourselves. I was told Tua is also taking some leadership steps recently. There was a practice where it was a little bit sloppy. He stopped the whole thing, sort of talked to the offense, maybe even laid into them a little bit. I was told that's something Tua would not have done a couple of years ago, but now he's a major voice in Miami."

He's still my favorite to be the best pro quarterback that Alabama has ever produced. He is the best collegiate one already. But Tua landed in the shield in a bad spot and lacked coaching and scheme and health. And now, all three have aligned once again for him.

Knock ‘em dead.

Remember several years ago when I said admins needed to go to congress, hat-in-hand, and beg for a congressional fix of the mess O’Bannon made? Of course, they didn't do it, and now the system is irretrievably broken in just two-plus years.

So now the grand poobahs decide to catch a charter to Dulles and beg lawmakers to fix what the courts (and NCAA obstinacy) clearly broke.

Among them is the loudest voice, the elder dean, Nick Saban — who could not have had a meeting with a better person: House GOP Whip Steve Scalise, the No. 2 in the House leadership. Scalise is a lifelong Nawlins’ coonass, with a degree from LSU. If anyone high up is positioned to truly get it, it would come via the dual corruption of a Congresscritter and LSU Alum.

They may not know their ischeal tuberosity from a pot hole, but they know Dem Tigahs.

"They’re on one piece of the front line," Sankey said of the coaches attending the D.C. visit. "They’re dealing with their teams. They’re involved with the culture of transfers in and out. They can have the opportunity to continue to contextualize what's happening within college athletics right now."

The SEC isn't alone.

More institutional leaders are expected in D.C. on Thursday for a summit on the future of college athletics hosted by the University of Arizona. That list includes NCAA president Charlie Baker, ACC commissioner Jim Phillips, MAC commissioner Jon Steinbrecher, Clemson athletic director Graham Neff and Kansas chancellor Douglas Girod, as well as representatives from several NIL collectives. Walker Jones, the executive director of Ole Miss’ Grove Collective, will be on a panel Thursday as part of the summit.

In May, Jones told Sports Illustrated that a group of nine collectives were in the early stages of creating a trade association to exchange best practices, share information and have a voice in potential federal legislation. Representatives from at least five of those collectives—Ole Miss, Tennessee, Clemson, Washington and Georgia—are expected in D.C. this week.

How broken is this system? Arkansas AD Hunter Yurachek told Congress yesterday a very bizarre truth: The majority of athletes can make more in unregulated under-the-table "NIL" than going pro:

"Young men and women are making decisions not to go to Major League Baseball or the WNBA or the NBA because they can make more money in college," Yurachek told the paper. "Does that make any sense, that you can make more money by staying in college than you can by going and being a professional athlete? That's where we have some issues in college athletics."

We’ve already seen it too in places like softball (not naming any names here); with players like Angel Reese; with tons of returnees on suddenly-hot CBB teams — despite having favorable draft grades, etc. If Big Chet's Used Yugo's wants to pay the All-American long snapper half-a-mill to stay for his senior season, that's a 40% pay increase over taking the league minimum in the NFL.

It's all so very broken.

Finally, for locals:

Long-time friend o’ the blog and occasional sponsor Druid City Brewing Company is looking to expand by adding a kitchen. They do so very much in and around and for Tuscaloosa and the larger Alabama community. If you would throw a few bones their way for their kitchen expansion, I bet the crew would appreciate it.

The great folks at @DruidCityBrew do so much for the community, so here's how those in the community can help them when they need it most. https://t.co/hPZyPEcr8e